Today, we have been married for Four years. (Together for Eleven 1/2) I remember our beautiful, and as close to perfect as it gets, Wedding Day like it was yesterday. I could write a hundred blog posts about that day but, what my once 9 year old little girl self (who was entirely too obsessed with Disney Fairytales) never realized is that it's not about the wedding. It's about the marriage. And marriage is not always flowers and exotic trips and surprise gifts, and bubble baths, and champagne and romantic dinners (although I am pleased to say our marriage has had a healthy helping of all of that). However, that's just not what real love is all about. So, if there are any 9 year olds reading this, kidding not 9, (if you are 9 and you are reading this on the IPhone you got way too early in life, stop! And go outside and ride your bike) but maybe some teens out there reading this, let me tell you what real love actually looks like.
For me, real love has become less about those things listed above and more about the fact that Jeremy has held my hair back while I threw up all night long (several times, and on one especially happy occasion hauled my 7 months pregnant self and not quite 2 year old daughter to the hospital at 3 a.m. because he feared I had lost too many fluids, and never once complained.) Love is the hands that gripped mine for dear life as I bore down and brought both of our beautiful babies in to the world, one a little too early (terrifying) and one with very little pain management (likely even more terrifying). Love is the eyes that have seen my deepest, ugliest sin (and I, his) that still choose to forgive and love. Love is the arms that have taken turns holding one another as we sobbed uncontrollably when we lost loved ones. Love is the mouth that still kisses me goodbye every morning even when I have morning breath, and tells me I'm beautiful when I look like something the cat drug in. Love is watching him get up at night when a baby cries out so that I won't have to this time because they are his babies, too. Or, holding a baby all night/day long so that I could get some sleep. Love is the man who takes off work to help you out when you are just completely overwhelmed with life's demands. Love is a man that deals with your crazy family drama like a champ (and never ever actually calls them crazy, though he might be thinking it.) Love is a man that changes poopy diapers. Love looks at you and his babies like you hung the moon and the sun and the stars. Love is a man who knows God actually hung all that stuff and leads your family towards Him every day.
Love is all of this and more. Because we don't live in a Disney movie. Where you get married and ride off in to the sunset in a horse drawn carriage to a castle where everything is always perfect. No, we live here, in the real world. That's why the vows say, "In SICKNESS and in health. "In plenty and in WANT." "For better or for WORSE." Because life is hard. Tough things happen. And superficial love won't weather the storms that are coming (and believe me they will come). But real, unconditional love, the kind you make a choice to show to your spouse every day no matter the circumstances, this is the kind of love you want. The kind I have with my hubby. We have weathered some really rough times, those listed above and so many more, yet here we stand. Beaten up a little and worn down but still together, more in love today with God, each other, and our children than we ever thought possible. Thank you baby, for NOT being the kind of "love" I thought I wanted as a 9 year old little girl, but being so much better than that. Every day with you is the best Fairytale and the greatest love story I could have ever hoped for. Happy 4 Years! And many more!
